3 Reasons You Fail To Reach Your Goals and What To Do Instead

3 Reasons You Fail To Reach Your Goals and What To Do Instead

 
 

We all have goals we want to achieve in our lives, but we often become frustrated when we don't get the results we were after ( if any results at all). Failure doesn't happen in a vacuum. We usually fail due to at least one of three reasons:

 
We all have goals we want to achieve in our lives, but we often become frustrated when we don't get the results we were after ( if any results at all). Failure doesn't happen in a vacuum. We usually fail due to at least one of three reasons. | Transformation Mentor | Beflourished
 

1. Your goals aren’t meaningful to you.

They are goals you want to achieve to make other people happy and they are based on the opinions of others. The goals you are setting are misaligned to your true desires, and so you lose the motivation to achieve them. They are based on “shoulds” and what you believe society expects from you.

Prevent this by getting in touch with YOU and what it is that YOU really want in your life. It is at that point that your goals will make sense to you and you will have the internal motivation to stick with things when the going gets tough.

2. Your goals lack clarity

If someone asked you to tell them about your goals you wouldn’t be able to articulate them clearly. This is because your goals are vague. You can’t get to a particular destination if you can’t find it on a map. You should be able to clearly and easily articulate your goals to others. Narrow in on what you really want by setting goals that are S.M.A.R.T.:

  • Specific. Make sure your goals are clear and unambiguous. What, specifically, do you want? For example, wanting to pursue a new hobby. Well, what hobby do you want to pursue? If you don’t know that yet, then what actions are you going to take to figure it out? It’s important to be specific so that your goal doesn’t become a fleeting thought.

     

  • Measurable. You should have a way to measure or assess whether or not you are actually making progress in achieving your goals. How do you know you’re getting closer to what you want? For example, if you want to learn a new skill, maybe you can measure your progress by the number of classes you’ve taken to learn it. Or how many days you’ve practiced your emerging skill.

     

  • Attainable. If your ultimate goal is not attainable just yet, set a smaller sub-goals that will get you to the point where your ultimate goal becomes attainable for you. There’s absolutely NOTHING wrong with reaching for the stars with your goals. BUT, it’s important to break them down into small enough pieces that they are actually attainable for you. If you want to go from A to Z, this most likely won’t happen in a couple of steps. It’s a good idea to break it down by making each letter in between a sub-goal along the way (in this case there are 25 steps or sub-goals that will get you from A to Z).

     

  • Relevant. Refer back to reason 1. Your goals need to be what YOU desire and not merely what you feel is expected of you. It’s difficult, if not impossible to work at achieving goals that you have no desire to achieve. If you don’t want it, you won’t have the internal drive to keep your motivation high enough to sustain your efforts. For example, many young adults are pressured by their parents to pursue law or medicine as a career only to drop out and never finish because it’s not what THEY wanted.

     

  • Time-bound. Your goal should contain a timeline for completion. This allows for you to shoot for completing milestones along the way, which will keep your motivation to see things through to the finish high. After you’ve mapped out your sub-goals that will get you to your end result, allot a reasonable time frame to complete each one. That way you know exactly how long it will take you to get from A to Z, and it will live in your mind as a soon-to-be reality instead of just a dream.

3. You are misinterpreting your emotions

The most common emotion that is misinterpreted is fear. This could be fear of embarrassment, fear of being hurt, or fear of rejection. Fear is a fight or flight reaction that is wired into our brains in order to keep us alive in a physically dangerous world, but we generally don’t need fear to keep us safe in the modern world. We aren’t constantly trying to outrun large animals that are trying to eat us, but our brains are still wired to react to uncertainty as if we are. As a result, your brain keeps you stuck “in your head” in order to prevent you from taking action toward any goal that it classifies as uncertain or risky.

Avoid getting stuck in fear mode by understanding that fear is normal. Whether or not you act or don’t act on fear is a CHOICE. Thank your brain for alerting you, let your brain know that there is no real danger, and keep moving forward!

When you make sure that your goals are meaningful, clear, and not derailed by fear, you will become unstoppable!


 
Mia Miller is a mother, wife, athlete, and lover of life. She is also a Mindset Coach and Transformation Mentor, and founder of Beflourished.com.